Thursday, December 31, 2009


I was in the middle of a real situation yesterday. I had to take on a giant pile of laundry armed with laundry soap and a pile of hangers. We have recently moved and my kitchen is littered with boxes and bags of stuff i have no idea where to store. I took out most of the laundry yesterday, but there is so much more! My dear mother in law means well, but she offers advice in many areas of how I do things and I bite my lip as she is going to be here for another week.
Then there is the situation with my husbands oldest daughter Brooke who is 10, but has some pretty searous mental health issues. She was curled up on the coutch in the fetal possition last night suckleing her blankie and just an hour earlier sobbing in walmart. She wants to be the baby so badly, but our youngest is 2 and she is the baby. She is also a daddys girl. She wants "up" allot and then Brooke age 10 bairly 60 pounds wants up too, but daddy cant hold bth unless he sits down and thats just not possiable in walmart checkout. Then the underjams come in. Brooke has to wear them to bed and was upset that her baby sister dosent. She is so jealous of her little sister and its hard for daddy to divide his time. Brooke dose live with her grandma in CA where she gets the serveices she needs. She has lived with her grandma for all her life and its getting hard for grandma to deal with her emoational issues and grandma gives in feeding the illness...
Well I am being given the eye by my mother in law now and I guess she feels I should be folding laundry and not blogging, but without an outlet i fear I would totally go nuts...
I have over 9 months clean and sober, a pile of clothse to hang and fold, a kitchen crowded with boxes and I am lucky in many ways.
I am so greatful that i have a home to live in, boxes of stuff to unpack and laundry to fold. I have my family that is togeather allthough my 6 year old has not yet seen our new home, but will soon. I did not wake up and have the need to get high or in some strange place with some strange guy...
I am going to get gone now and begin on this laundry pile and everything allong the way...

Thursday, December 24, 2009

After-Christmas Party!!!

Well I am going to publish this post this way until someone tells my how to create a clickable link to the party!
This is so something I want in on because who on earth doesn't want to score from toys? Being a mother of 3 children ages 10, 6 and 2 I could use all the help I can get! I also have 4 lovely nieces- all girls ages 16, 14 and 11 and another 5 year old niece in Portland! God Bless my brother for having 3 teenage girls! LOL!
OK on to the goodies
Copy & Paste this link in your URL to get over to My four Monkeys where you will get detailed info on the whole after-Christmas bash and get your meat-hooks into this whole deal, Ite?

what this will do is gain you extra entry's if you blog and post the giveaway button on your blog and by doing both you get a total of !) EXTRA ENTRY'S IN EACH GIVEAWAY!!! Heck, you will be a regular VIP!

Here is the sweet little button that scores you 5 extra entry's!

here's the numeric code for the image!!

Bare with me I'm new at this, but I will catch on!

My Four Monkeys

How do I...create a hyper-link

How the heck to I create a clickable link in my blog??

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Tonight was tereable. My toddler will not stay in bed and i am so stressed I could go nuts! Sometimes I feel like I am doing it all by myself, but I know the Good Lord is helping me even though I dont feel like it at times. I have been a single mom and there are times when I just feel like I still am even though my husband sleeps soundly in bed as I deal with an out of control toddler.
There are many pretty searous issues surrounding this. I just got my daughter back from foster care where she was placed for about a year dew to our mistakes with drugs and drinking. I know its much harder on her, but what I dont know is how to parent her correctly. I feel like a bad mom when she sobs about bed time, but then again I know bounderies need to be in place for her to feel safe. I try to sit beside her little bed with her, read, sing and pray with her after about a half an hour of that we turn the lights ont and she wants the dog, daddy, to pee, to drink and all the above repeats..she is nearly entirely pottyy trained so when she says i need to pee i take her in there and she sits on her little chair and states " I want to eat " I know she is not hungry, she did not have to pee, and she is working me. Paitence I have to say I need to work on a bit, but after 2 hours its ten at night and she finally fell into a deep enoufgh sleep that I was able to tip toe out of her bedroom and here I am. I'm wiped.
I know what to do? do i? do i just lay there with her? she wants to talk, get dog-dog, etc..she will not stay in her bed unless I AM IN THERE!! So do I just make that the nightly routeen? I guess it will be untill she adjusts more.
I feel so bad that I did this to her. Ug.
Well im off to giveaway land then to bed..toodles.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

All moved in!

Well, we are moved into our new house! I love it! not everything is unpacked and the stress of having Christmas Dinner at my house is getting more intence! There are boxes everywhere and the old house still needs cleaned if we want our deposet back.
God Bless hubbys sponsor as he was the only one to come through to help us move and Joe has agreed to split the deposit with him if he helps us clean the old place up to bring it back to the luster it was when we moved in. It's just the right thing to do! That place was falling apart. After looking at countless homes in search of the one we are in now, it brought to light all the exsisting problems the rental we once occupied had. Dry rot, pests galore ( no roatches thank God ).
Today is my first ever cookie party and I made oreo bark. I had to make it late last night and it was pretty easy. I have a 20 dollar gift card for the gift exchange at my sponsors place. My sponsor happens to be joes sponsors wife! Go figure. For those of you who havent guessed by now I am a member of AA and our "sponsors" work the steps with us and are there for us when we need to talk.
I had better go. Hubby is up and bitching. I need to phone the garbage man first thing in the morning! yikes!

Thursday, December 17, 2009

A new start

Well my husband and I are sitting here attempting to figure out who we trust to help us move all our stuff. We have to move an entire house of stuff today and as we sift through phone numbers we probly should have sifted through days ago we keep running into problems.
One guy, he's great, but alas he is on the run from the law and we would not want to be connected with that. Last time he helped us move his abilitys were wonderful and he was sober, not running from his PO and his ability to know just how to do everything right helped us out allot! It is too bad this disease grabbed him back up.
It's hard when your in early recovery (9 months) and your old friends are off limits and your new ones are a bit iffey because you dont exactly know the backrounds of everyone you meet at an AA meeting!!
Our sponsors both work at the local prisons and have 30 years between the two of them. I have known them both personally for over 10 years.
I don't see my husband and I being able to do this well on our own dew to my lower back problems and the way we bicker under pressure. We need man power.
There is a lovely young man we will call Ray at the local recovery house. He was a certified foster parent with a weed problem who wandered into the rooms sick of having his head in the clouds and stealing change from his son. AA has done amazing things for him as he is a fine man today and walked into the club with an armload of presents for the children of the parents that frequent the club for meetings.
We have talked with him briefly about the move, but we dont know if he is a licenced driver and weather or not dh will even let him drive our nice FordFi50!
Well on another note I am begining a new chapter of my life today moving into a new home we actualy own! It is amazing to see what a little soberity dose for a couple of formar drunks/addicts like us. We have it in us to make it and I am so happy to say those people in the meetings encourageing me every step of the way was the turning point for us! Them like dh and I suffer from an incureable disease called addiction, but they have a solution to the problem and I have chosen to go with it!
Well, here I go God! Thanks for the second chance!

Monday, December 7, 2009

My Franklin Goose Registry

My Franklin Goose Registry

My Franklin Goose Registry

My Franklin Goose Registry

My mom, my life and Things Remembered *GIVEAWAY*

Let me tell you about my mother Carol. She is an amazing woman and for years when i had my head in the bag she stiid by me loving me, yet not inableing me. Encourageing me and never doubting that one day her little girl would surender to this disease I like to call Addiction.
She fought it by by side in her own way by raiding parties in surrounding neighbourhoods demanding to whoever answered the door to tell her of the whereabouts of her teenage daughter or the police would arive in no time. She tried , yet i resisted and scailed the back fence breaking into a run as soon as my feet hit the ground.
Later..years later when I was living the life one addicted from youth lives. on coutches and homeless shelters. She never doubted that I would pull out of it. I know from her telling me she stayed up many nights praying for my saftey and protection and let me tell you my mother is not a religious woman, but a mother in fear of her babies life. Can you imagine knowing your little girl is at the mercy of those streets? I can and I am ashaimed I did the things i did. To her.

All the times she and my dad showed up to court in hopes they would lock me up for a really long time so they could sleep at night only to see the juvinal system harden and school me in Criminal Lifestyle 101. Then came the County, where I was hardened by the system as a young adult.

Mt mom was glad when I had my babies Steven now 6 and Angel now 2..I would love to tell you that the birth of my oldest child got me sober and I never looked back, but thats simply not true. I proceded to drink and use well into my 20's and Im now 30 and finally am coming up on a year in March 2010 God Willing!

I want you to know sometimes being a mom is harder than it looks because in reality there are a ton of temptations for our children and they are not getting any less with age.
I love my mom and I have entered the following giveaway in hopes if winning her this bracelet!



the varity of things on the site is wonderful and they even have gifts for other members of your family and lots of stuff is marked down! I love the snow globs and family tree picture fraims!

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Vtech Toy Giveaway

I just came across another cool toy giveaway!
check it out here